Can it truly be August already? Another year almost gone into memory and what have I to show for it? I was so sure that this year would finally be different I really thought that this year Id escape this spiders web in which I feel entombed. And yet, as much as I wish otherwise, the little date shows August 13th. My gods, where does the time go?
You ever feel like youre falling? Like the ground is rushing up upon you and for all your pinwheeled arms, it continues to grow larger and larger and dominate more and more of your vision soon, you can see nothing beyond that cold, hard, earth and you panic. You feel the weight of momentum forcing you down further and further until you just know the impact is going to kill you it will shatter your hopes and your dreams it will crush your spirit; your soul, and your mind you blink and it seems the ground has doubled in that instant larger and larger it looms at you and you know that no matter what you do, eventually your time will run out and the ground will win...
I feel this way everyday. I can see the ground below me; the huge expanse against this tiny, fragile, little shell and I know that it will win. Each day that I live this life, the ground grows larger below me. Each day that I conform to this path, I lose more and more of myself. And yet, I love the things that this course brings me I love my car, my room, my little desk by the window, i love my family, my friends,and all that surrounds me its easy to sell off your soul piece by piece and dismiss it away its easy to say, just one more day...And all those little pieces of soul add up until I wonder how much is left? Will I know when I sacrifice the last piece of me? Will I know when Ive reached the Point of No Return? Or will it simply blur past as I continue my plummet?
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