Umberto Eco - Baudolino
"...but now back to my storey of when I was in the Frescheta woods there specially when theres real fog when you cant see the tip of your nose dont see them coming then I have visions like that time when I saw the unicorn and the other time when I saw Saint Baudolino who spoke to me and said sonofawhore youre going to Hell because the unicorn story goes like this everyboy knows that to hunt a unicorn you have to put a girl whose still a virgin at the foot of a tree and the animal smells the virgin smell and comes and puts his head in her lap so I took Bergolio's Nena who had come with her father to buy my fathers cow and I said to her come into woods with me and well hunt the unicorn then I put her under the Tree because I was sure she was a virgin and I said to her sit still like this and spread your legs to make room for the animal's head and she asked spread like this and I said there right there and I touched her and she began making some noises like nanny goat dropping a kid and I lost my head and had something like a napocalips and afterwards she wasn'tre pure like a lily anymore and she said o my god now how will we make the unicorn come and just then I heard a voice from Heaven said that the unicorn qui tollis peccata mundis was me and I started jumping around the bushes and crying hip heee frr frrr because I was happier than a real unicorn because I had put my horn in the virgin's lap and this was why Saint Boudolino had called me son et setera but then he forgave me and I caught site of him other times but only if there is plenty of fog or if it isn't bright like to scorch everything...."
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